There are a number of reasons as to why someone would reach out for the support of a therapist or a counsellor. Still, if someone was to take this step, it could show that they are going through tough a time and can no longer handle what is going on.
Perhaps they are experiencing a fair amount of fear and anxiety, making it difficult for them to relax and to embrace life. For most of their life, they may have been fine, but now life will be a challenge.
Then again, their life may have been this for as long as they can remember. For one reason or another, then, they will have decided that enough is enough and that something needs to be done.
In this case, one might not be able to imagine what their life would be like if they no longer felt so tense and were able to feel at ease. Yet, even if this is so, it won’t have stopped them from trying to do something about how they experience life.
The Next Step
Now, irrespective of how long someone has experienced life in this way for, they are going to want their life to change. It might not matter how they change their life either, as long as it doesn’t stay the same.
When they work with a therapist or a counsellor, for instance, the focus could be on what is taking place in their mind. This person could ask them to talk about what thoughts they usually have and what they focus on.
The Main Area
They could soon be told that they need to change what is taking place in their mind in order to experience life differently. What is going on there could even be described as irrational and having no basis in reality.
So, if they were to take a step back and to detach from what is taking place in their mind, they may see that there is no reason for them to be on edge or to live on the sidelines. Their mind will be playing tricks on them and the sooner that they realise this, the better.
Therefore, unless they are told that what is taking place in their mind is the result of what they believe, for instance, it will be as though their thoughts are just appearing out of nowhere and that they just focus on certain things. There will be nothing that is taking place at a deeper level that they will need to look into.
Unlike a weed that will be supported by a deep root, there will be no deep roots that are sustaining what is taking place in their mind. Ergo, as they change what is going on up top, the rest of their life should also change.
A New Beginning
Through working on what is taking place in their mind in the company of their therapist/ counsellor and in their own time, they may find that they start to settle down and to become more involved in life. If this does take place, they could be amazed by how different their life is.
Additionally, they could sleep better, find it easier to concentrate, and their memory could improve, amongst other things. Conversely, this approach might not work or if it does, it might only work for a short while.
An Unexpected Outcome
If their life only changes for a short while, they could come to conclude that their life will never change. It might seem as though they were just dreaming and now they have woken up.
On the other hand, if their life didn’t change at all, they could experience a deep sense of helplessness. The key at this point will be for them to get back on their feet and to look for another way to change their life.
If they were to keep going, what they may come to see is that what is taking place in their mind is just a small part of what is going on. What could lead to this understanding is if they were to get in touch with what is taking place further down - their body.
By connecting to this part of their being, what they may find is that there is a scared child inside them. Without knowing it, this child self will have been influencing how their adult self perceived the world.
The Past Is Present
With this in mind, it makes sense as to why it will have been so hard for them to feel at ease and to embrace life. Ultimately, their childhood years will be firmly in the past, but they will still be carrying the impact of what took place all those years ago.
This could have been a time in their life when there was one thing that traumatised them or this may have been a time when they were traumatised on a regular basis. The years would have passed, causing them to lose touch with what took place, but what took place would still have seeped into their conscious mind.
If they hadn’t tried another approach, it wouldn’t have been possible for them to see that they were projecting their past onto their present. This can be seen as their minds way of getting them to acknowledge what is taking place inside them so that they can resolve it and become more integrated in the process.
The trouble is that unless one has developed an observer self and is able to tune into what is taking place inside them, they won’t be able to connect the dots, so to speak. Their focus will be on what is taking place ‘out there’, which can cause them to see themselves as a powerless victim.
If one can relate to this, and they are ready to change their life, they may need to work with a therapist or a healer. This will give them the chance to explore what is taking place in their body and to acknowledge it.
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Oliver JR Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Author of 25 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.
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That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.