For a number of years now, some people have used different labels to describe themselves. This is something that can be observed by looking at the profiles that some people have created on different social media sites.
When it comes to the labels that someone might use on social media, it could relate to their gender, sexual orientation, race and even what political party they support. The labels that they use are then going to represent who they are. The Real World However, even if someone like this was in the real world and another person asked them to describe themselves, they could still come out with the same things. They may even say that they are part of a certain community. The person who asked them this could also use the same or similar labels to describe themselves. Then again, this person might wonder who one actually is, behind the labels that they have used. Effortless What is clear is that if someone does use these kinds of labels to describe themselves, it won’t have taken them a lot of effort to form their identity. The main thing that they would have needed to do would have been to look in the mirror and to think about who they are attracted to. So instead of their identiity being something that took months, if not years, to develop; it could have been formed in a matter of minutes. It will be as if one went into a fast food restaurant and ordered an identity as opposed to a meal. A Big Difference Now that they have this identity, it may have filled their inner world with a sense of certainty, allowing them to feel more confident as a result. It could also give them a sense of belonging as there will be other people who also use the same labels as they do. At one point in time, then, they may have felt isolated and cut-off from others, but thanks to their new identity, they will be part of something bigger. They will be able to receive the acceptance that might not have been available before. The Easy Option Still, even though these labels will have settled their mind down and provided them with a sense of self, it doesn’t mean that they are in touch with who they are actually are. If anything, they will have just put on a readymade suite instead of creating their own. Ultimately, there is far more to them than their race, gender or sexual orientation, for instance. Most likely, these were things that were already set in stone before they were even born. Two Parts In order for one to find out who they are actually are, there will be what they need to do externally and what they need to do internally. When it comes to the first part, trying out different things and travelling to different countries can play part in them being able to connect to their true-self. As for the second part, this will relate to them getting in touch with their body and connecting to the information that is there. It could be said that the first part is far easier than the second part. Going Deeper The reason for this is that this is the part of their being where emotional pain will be found. Disconnecting from this part of themselves will have allowed them to avoid pain, but the trouble is that it will also have separated them from their true essence. With this in mind, living on the surface of themselves and relying on different labels can allow them to avoid the pain of having to go deep within themselves. Nonetheless, it is through embracing this part of their being that they will be able to embrace their own individuality. A Key Area If one was born as a ‘blank slate’, there would be nothing for them to find within themselves. But as this is not the case and they were born with certain abilities and traits, among other things, looking within will play an important role in them being able to connect to their true-self. Along with being able to connect to their feelings, this is also somewhere where one will be able to connect to their needs. These needs will inform them of what they need to do in each moment of their life and what they need to do to live a fulfilling life. A Build-Up If one is carrying a lot of emotional pain in their body, it can be due to what they have experienced in their adult life. Along with this, what took place during their early years may have also played a part. If it goes go back to their early years, what took place here may have also prevented them from developing a strong sense of self. Perhaps this was a time when they were abused and/or neglected. Awareness One may find that it is too painful for them to embrace how they feel in their body, and this means that they may need to reach out for external support. This is something that can be provided by the assistance of a therapist or a healer. Connecting to their true-self is not going to happen overnight, yet it will happen as long as they are patient and persistent. Being in touch with who they are will most likely allow them to live a life that is far more fulfilling than the life they would lead if they simply identified with different labels.
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Oliver JR Cooper http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk
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Oliver JR CooperAuthor of 27 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant. Introductory Consultation
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Disclaimer
That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.
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