For a number of years now, the self development industry has been doing what it can to make people realise that they are not victims - to allow them to see that they have an effect on the world. But, in recent years, so many people have been conditioned to see themselves as victims.
This is primarily the result of what is often described as ‘identity politics’, and this is where just about everyone is put into two groups. Someone is then either going to be an oppressed victim or they will be an oppressive perpetrator.
The Death of the Individual
When it comes to what will define whether someone belongs to first or the second group, the colour of their skin, their gender and their sexual orientation will play a big part. Not only will this stop someone from being able to see other people as individuals, it will also stop them from being able to see themselves as an individual.
On the plus side, seeing the world in this way will stop this person from having to use their brain as much. Through putting people into different boxes and seeing the world as being black and white, they won’t expend as much mental energy.
A New Meaning
So, although having a victim mentality was generally seen as something negative thanks in part to the self development industry, it has become something that is often seen as something positive thanks to conditioning from the education system and the mainstream media.
Some people would say that this is the result of ‘Cultural Marxism’, but, whatever the cause is, it is clear that certain people are often encouraged to see themselves as victims in today’s world. When someone has a victim mentality, they can see themselves as being a virtuous human being.
They are then going to feel disempowered on one side, but they will feel as though they are morally superior human beings on the other. The reason why they will feel superior to other people is that they are going to believe that - unlike the people who are oppressing people - they are not ‘oppressing’ anyone.
They are not going to believe that certain people are empowered human beings who don’t need to oppress anyone to fulfil their needs; this is not a dynamic that will exist in their mind. The people who are empowered are then going to be thrown into the same box as the people who do oppress others, and these people are going to be immoral in comparison.
A Number of Benefits
This doesn’t mean that their needs won’t be met, though, and this is because their victim status will most likely allow them to receive things without having to give anything in return. Being a victim is then going to allow them to experience control in an underhand way.
They won’t need to work for anything; they will be entitled to have just about anything they want from the people who are supposedly holding them back. It will be as if an invisible force exists, and that this force is controlling every part of their life.
A Number of Similarities
However, regardless of whether someone has bought into identity politics or just feels like a victim, they are unlikely believe that they have much an effect on their life. Consequently, it will probably be normal for them to feel powerless, helpless, angry and frustrated, among other things.
They might be used to spending time with people who are happy to walk over them and to completely disregard their needs. If they are in a relationship, they might be with someone who physically abuses them, and, if they are not, they might have been with people like this in the past.
A Bleak Existence
When it comes to their career - that’s if they have one - they might have a job that is deeply unfulfilling. Yet, although they what they do drains them, it could be seen as the only option that is available to them.
If they are on the other side of the fence, so to speak, and haven’t been able to get a job, they could believe that the world is trying to hold them back. Something out there is then not allowing them to get ahead.
One is then going to be nothing more than an observer of their reality, meaning that they won’t play a part in how they experience life. They will be one person who shows up in every experience that they have, but this won’t matter.
Their thoughts, feelings and what they believe about the world and themselves, along with their behaviour, will be irrelevant. And what will validate this outlook is that they are likely to spend time with people who experience life in a similar way.
The reason someone like this believes that they don’t have an effect on their reality is most likely due to the fact that they are out of touch with their inner world and are too attached to their mind. If they were able to detach from their mind and to get in touch with what is taking place within them, they may be able to see how their external world is mirroring back what is taking place in their internal world.
It is then not they are merely an observer of their reality; they are actually playing a big part in how they experience life. With this in mind, they are not being victimised by others, they are being victimised by themselves.
Even though it is not going to be empowering for them to experience life in this way, it is likely to be what feels safe at a deeper level. And, until they become aware of why this is and do something about it, their life will most likely stay the same.
If they were to look back on their childhood years, they may that that is wasn’t safe for them to express themselves. This would have caused them to associate staying small with being safe and it would have set them up to feel comfortable with being treated badly.
When it comes to letting go of a victim mentality, one may need to reach out for external support. This is something that can be provided by the assistance of a therapist or a healer.
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Oliver JR Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Author of 25 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.
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That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.