While some people feel as though it is safe for them to exist, there are others who don’t. Even so, this could be something that someone is not consciously aware of; how they experience life could just be what is normal.
Part of Life
However, if they were asked about what they do each day, for instance, this would give them the chance to open up about how they experience life. It is then through what could be described as an, indirect approach, that another person could find out whether or not they feel safe.
What they do and what they don’t do in life will say a lot about what is taking place within them. Still, if one of their friends was to ask them about what they have been doing, it doesn’t mean that it will have much of an effect on them.
When it comes to what comes out of their mouth, it might be no different to what they have heard in the past, and so there will be no reason for them to reflect on what they hear. Also, there is the possibility that this is someone who experiences life in the same way.
If this person generally feels safe, their close friends could be the same and vice versa. But if they find it hard to feel safe or if they are aware of what can happen when this is not the case, it may give them the ability to notice when one of their friends is experiencing life in this way.
What one is likely to find, when they feel safe, is that they are in touch with their body. So regardless of whether they are by themselves or around others, they will typically have a good connection with what is taking place within term.
Consequently, this will enable one to express their true needs and feelings; which means that they will be able to express their true-self. Being in touch with their needs and feelings is important, but if they didn’t feel safe enough to express them they would be overlooked.
And as one feels safe enough to be themselves, it is going to allow them to have relationships that are deeply fulfilling. The reason for this is that one will be able to open up and to be vulnerable.
When this happens, one will talk about what their dreams are and express how they feel, among other things. Through doing this, it will allow other people to feel connected to them.
There will probably be times when this causes them to feel uncomfortable, but that doesn’t mean that they will feel as though their life is under threat. And if someone didn’t respond in a positive manner, they would be able to protect themselves.
They are not going to be willing to put up with someone who will put them down or invalidate their experiences. One could then tell them directly and see how they behave as time goes by, or they could cut their ties with them.
A Completely Different Experience
On the other hand, when one doesn’t feel safe it can be challenge for them to connect with what is taking place within them. Along with this, it might not matter if they are around others or by themselves, as they could still feel on edge.
One could then live in an area that is fairly safe or go somewhere where no one else is around, yet they could feel as though their life is at risk. This doesn’t mean that they will be aware of the thoughts that are running through their mind though, as their mind could be consumed by fear and anxiety.
Naturally, this is going to take a lot out of them, and this is likely to mean that they will have moments when they feel as though they have too much energy and moments when they feel burnt out. They may have a number of ways to deal with the fear and anxiety that is within them and some of these may have a negative effect on their life.
For example, one could spend a lot of time by themselves and, while this may allow them to regulate how they feel, it could also cause them to feel disconnected from others. But if they were to go out more, it is unlikely to be any better.
And even though one may rarely open up about how they feel, that doesn’t mean that this will have much of an effect on how they experience life. Ultimately, one is not going to need to open up to feel exposed.
It might even seem as though the external world is closing in on them and that it wants to obliterate them. They are going to feel as though their life is under threat, and it could be as if they are in a war zone.
Their priority will be to do everything they can to feel safe, and this is going to make it hard for them to fulfil the rest of their needs. If one did feel safe, their whole world would open up and this would then allow them to live a fulfilling life.
What this can show is that one has experienced trauma, and this can be something that has taken place in their adult years and/or it could go back to their childhood. Perhaps this was a time when they were abused and/or neglected.
If one can relate to this, and they want to change their life, it might be a good idea for them to reach out for external support. This is something that can be provided by a therapist or a healer.
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Oliver JR Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Author of 26 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.
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That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.