I was recently thinking about what factors play a part when it comes to what makes someone a good healer/therapist. During this time, I thought about the kind of people who I had worked with over the years.
Over the years, I have worked with numerous healers and therapists, and I would say that not one of them was the same. At the same time, while they were not all the same, most of them had a number of things in common. Empathy The first thing that I noticed was that, in general, they were very good at putting themselves in my shoes. This meant that they were willing to put their own life to one side and to connect with what was going on for me. Clearly, if someone like this is unable to empathise, they are in the wrong job. This could be seen as a foundational piece and not something that can be missing if someone is to assist others. Non-Judgement Along with this, I could talk about whatever was going on for me, or what I had been through in the past, and I wasn’t judged in any way. As a result of this, I felt as though it was safe for me to open up. If this hadn’t of taken place, I would have come to believe that I couldn’t trust them and this would have caused me keep everything to myself. I would then have made very little, if any, progress. Competence When I went into what I was going through or had been through, they were also able to understand me. It was then not that they could just put themselves in my shoes; they also knew what I was talking about. This understanding was backed up by the technique (or tools) that they had to assist me in making progress. If they had only understood me but were unable to do anything else, I wouldn’t have got very far. Complete Presence During a session, every part of them showed up, and this meant that they were able to function at their best. This allowed me to feel heard, respected and as though they valued me. If, on the other hand, they had their phone out or started talking about something unrelated, it would have been clear that they were not committed to what they were doing. Again, this would have stopped me from being able to let go and to completely show up. Reliable When I had booked an appointment, it would usually take place when it was supposed, and this is something that is essential. As there were periods when I wasn’t in a good way, I needed to know that I could rely on someone to be there for me. If they were always cancelling sessions or showing up late, it would have resulted in me experiencing even more pain. And, the fact that they showed up on the right day and at the right time showed their level of care and commitment. Final Thoughts I would say that I have been very fortunate to have worked with a number of therapists and healers who were committed to what they were doing. Perhaps this was partly due to how committed I was to my own healing; I wasn’t looking to waste time. So, if you are looking to find a healer/therapist to work with, the list above will give you a good idea of what to look out for. And, if you are already working with someone and they don’t possess all of the traits above, you may need to find someone else.
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Oliver JR Cooper http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk
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Oliver JR CooperAuthor of 28 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant. Introductory Consultation
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Disclaimer
That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.
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