When The Past Is Present

In the book, ‘When The past is Present’, David Richo goes into how our past can still influence what is taking place in our present This was a book I read in 2012, so I can’t remember any specific details about it.

However, I had an experience recently that clearly demonstrated how what took place in the past can impact the present. I often spend a certain amount of time in an environment where, at times, I feel as though I’m walking on eggshells.

Unstable

As to whether or not I can relax depends on if a certain person is there or not; if they are, I feel as though I have to be on alert and, if they are not, I can settle down. When I crossed paths with this person a little while ago, my inner world soon changed.

And what added to this experience was when this person ended up making a big deal over something that hadn’t been done. I already felt tense, and I ended feeling emotionally overwhelmed.

The Outcome

Afterwards, part of me became angry and I thought about getting my own back. I could have felt like a victim and seen this person as a perpetrator, which would have meant that I played no part in what took place.

One way of looking at this would be to say that there was absolutely no reason for me to feel this way as my life was not under threat. But, when this situation is looked at from a deeper place, it is possible to see the bigger picture.

A Mirror

There are two parts here: what happened between me and the other person, and what caused me to spend time in this environment to begin with. How I feel when I’m around this person is similar to how I used to feel around my mother as a child – she was emotionally unstable, to say the least.

Many years have passed since that time but, the trauma of those years had stayed within me. How I felt, along with the beliefs I created during this time, is then what played a big part in me having this experience and being drawn to this environment.

Self-Awareness

Now, it wasn’t pleasant for me to have this experience, and if I hadn’t been aware of what was going on, I would have believed that I played no part in what took place. This doesn’t mean that I’m ‘special’ or have a special ability; it’s simply the result of all the work I have put in to understand myself since 2003.

The experiences that I had as a child set me up to feel comfortable with being around people who were emotionally unstable. This became what was familiar, and what is familiar is what is safe to the ego mind.

Final Thoughts

Before this incident took place I was aware of how an early wound was being played out with this person, yet my awareness increased after this took place. Up until this point, it was as though I was looking though a window that wasn’t completely clear.

Due to the work I had done on myself, I was able to observe what was taking place within me. If, on the other hand, I had been identified with it, it would have stopped me from being able to see how my external world was mirroring back what was taking place within me.
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If you can see that there are certain patterns that continually play out in your life, and you want to embrace your inherent power, it might be a good idea for you to reach out for external support. This can be provided by a therapist or a healer, for instance. 

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Oliver JR Cooper
http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk