Just because super heroes are not real people, it doesn’t mean that some people don’t try to mimic them in the real world. When this takes place, someone can have the tendency to try to save/rescue others.
These are unlikely to be people who are stuck in a burning building or who are about to be crushed, for instance, but they are going to have problems. They could have emotional problems, be stuck in unfulfilling relationships or just feel a bit lost in life, amongst other things.
A Strong Attraction
Yet, regardless of what they are going through, someone will be drawn to them like a magnet is drawn to metal. Their life can be put to one side, that’s if they have much of a life, and their whole focus can be on another person’s life.
It might not even matter if another person has asked for their help as they could literally steamroll in and give it to them anyway. This could be just one more person in their life who they are trying to fix.
From the outside, it may seem as though they don’t have needs or that they always put other people’s needs before their own. In reality, someone like this probably feels ashamed of their own needs, which is why they are so consumed with other people’s needs.
Not only this, they can also feel extremely incapable at a deeper level, with this being the reason why they believe that other people need to be fixed. But, due to being out of touch with this part of themselves, they project how they feel into others.
Taking this into account, being there for others in this way allows them to keep their true feelings at bay. What this also means is that their true intention is not to actually assist another; it is keep them were they are or to allow them to rise slightly higher.
The reason for this is that if another person was to actually get back on their feet, they would no longer be able to project how they feel into them. It is then going to be essential for them to make sure that another person continues to play the same role or else they might have to face with their own inner wounds.
Someone like this can then come across as being capable and even powerful, yet this is likely to have very little in common with how they truly feel. If they actually felt capable, there would be no need for them to believe that other people need to be saved.
They might see that there at times when people need help, but this is going to be radically different. Offering assistance is not the same as trying to save/rescue another; the former will empower them and allow them to stand on their own two feet, while the latter will disempower them and set them up to be dependent.
If someone can see that they have the inclination to try to fix others, overlooking their own needs in the process and setting others up to be dependent on them in one way or another, they may need to reach out for external support. By having this external support, it will allow them to face the pain within them that they have been trying to avoid for so long.
This support is something that can be provided by the assistance of a therapist or a healer.
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Oliver JR Cooper
Oliver JR Cooper
Author of 25 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant.
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That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.