Regardless of whether someone has spent time at university and/or on social media, they may have come across white people who hate their own race. This could be something that has made them scratch their head, so to speak, or it might not have simply gone over their head.
When someone behaves in this way, they are likely to believe that their race is bad due to what took place in the past. And the view that they have of the past is likely to have been given to them by the system. Two Sources So, what they have been told by the mainstream media and the education system will have played the biggest part. One of the things that could consume their mind is how it was white people who colonised other countries and kept slaves. Along with this, there will be what white people are doing to hold other races back. It is then not going to matter what each white person is doing on the planet or how they treat others, as the colour of their skin will make them guilty by association. The Problem The only people who are capable of doing harmful things will be those who belong to the white race – they are the savages and the ‘colonisers’. People from other races, on the other hand, won’t be capable of the same level of brutality. Or, if people from other races do do bad things, it will only be because of what white people have done to them. In this case, they will simple be protecting themselves, thereby their behaviour will be justified. The Solution Someone like this can believe that the best way to change the world is if white people were basically wiped out. One can then choose not to have children and to do what they can to remove white people from positions of power. What they will find, due to the mainstream Medias tendency to go along with this view and to actively encourage racial tension, is that they won’t have to worry about being banned online. Therefore, one can say practically whatever they want about people who have the same skin colour as they do. Approval Talking about how bad their own race is is likely to result in them receiving a fair amount of positive feedback from others. White people, along with people from other races, will be happy to ‘like’ and to leave supportive comments. If someone does ‘like’ what they have written and they are not white, it won’t be seen in the same as it would if a white person was to talk in the same way about another race. This is primarily due to the view that it is only possible for white people to be racist. A Decent Human Being Someone who is white can then hate themselves, due to the colour of their own skin and anyone else who has the same skin colour, but they can end up feeling as though they are a good person. Behaving in this way can allow them to a rise to certain level within the social justice hierarchy. Writing things on social media might not be enough, though, and they might end up creating videos. Doing this will allow them to receive even more positive feedback from others, which may increase their social standing. A Strange Scenario It can be hard to comprehend how someone like this could feel good about themselves, especially as they hate a big part of them – their skin. One way of looking at this would be to say that someone like this is carrying a lot of inner conflict (cognitive dissonance). What they hate about white people is something that they see every time they look at themselves, let alone other white people. So, how can someone like this feel good about themselves when they are carrying so much self-hate? Going Deeper What they will have probably done to stop this part of them from affecting their mental and emotional health, is to project it onto the people who have white skin. Ergo, the reason why they will experience so much hate towards these people is due to the fact that they remind of the part of themselves that they hate. It has been said that what we hate in others is merely a reflection of that which we hate in ourselves, and in this example, it can appear to relate to something physical. Yet, even though it may seem as though one hates themselves due to the propaganda they have picked up during their time in the education system and the mainstream media, for instance, there could be more to it. An Easy Target Before one even went to college/university, they could have felt completely worthless. Hating people who had the same colour skin as them would then have been a way for them to elevate themselves out of the hole that they were in. This would have taken place by disconnecting from their self–hate and becoming sanctimonious in the process. In the beginning they may have felt inferior to others but, thanks to the false-self that they have created, they are likely feel superior to others. Conclusion This person may have experienced some kind of abuse and/or neglect when they were younger, setting them up to identity with the feeling of being worthless. Facing up to how they really feel will be too painful, hence why they have ended up behaving in this way. What this illustrates is how someone can come across as though they are a moral human being who wants to make a difference, when in reality; they are simply avoiding their own pain. One is then not going to be adding more peace, harmony and love to the world, for instance, they will be adding more drama to it.
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Oliver JR Cooper http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk
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A lot of attention has been given to the type of person who sees others as an extension of themselves. In this case, someone won’t believe that other people have their own thoughts, feelings, and interests, and are, therefore, individuals.
It will be as though other people have nothing going on within them and are simply there to fulfil their needs. What this will mean is that one will believe that they are entitled to treat them however they want to treat them. One Function After all, as far as they are concerned, the sole reason for other people’s existence will be to fulfil their needs; nothing more, nothing less. So, in the same way that one wouldn’t have to ask any one for permission in order to use their own car, for instance, they won’t need to ask another person for permission if they want anything from them. The only thing that they will need to do is to take what they want from someone, and this may involve using them or it could mean that they will just use something that belongs to them. One is also going to see themselves as the centre of the universe, which will cause them to demand a lot of attention. All Eyes on Them One is then going to need to be the centre of attention, no matter where they are or what is going on. They could have the tendency to talk over others and to talk louder than everyone else. It won’t be acceptable for another person to have their own life or to do things without them, either. What will be acceptable is for the people in their life to focus their attention on them and to make them part of everything they do. An Energy Vampire One way of looking at this would be to say that someone like this will steal energy from the people around them. The energy that they take will end up being used to keep their ego inflated. They are not going to be on the same level as other people; no, they will be superior beings. Through being special or different, it will give them the right to behave how they want and to take whatever they want. A False-Self Someone like this could have a limit range of emotions, and may typically only experience emotions that are in alignment with their sense of superiority. If their view of themselves is challenged in any way or if another person doesn’t respond how they want, they could end up being consumed with rage. This is likely to be a defence against feeling rejected, helpless, powerless and worthless, amongst other things. Thus, as long as people do what they want and they are able to receive positive feedback, this side shouldn’t come out. The Other Side What is also spoken about, though not as commonly, is the type of person who usually ends up with people like this. The person above is focused on their own needs and doesn’t care about other people’s needs; whereas this person doesn’t care about their own needs and only cares about others people needs. Their primary concern is then going to be to do what they can to fulfil other people’s needs, overlooking their own. In fact, due to being focused on other people needs, they might not even be aware of their own needs. Selfless One can then come across as though they are only too happy to do what they can to meet other people’s needs. Acting as if they are simply an extension of others is then going to be part of who they are. Neglecting their own needs is going to be what feels comfortable, and this is most likely going to stop them from realising that they are being taken advantage of. Thus, when someone treats them as though they are merely an extension of them, it is not going to stand out. A Strong Attraction If someone treated them differently, and focussed on their needs, it probably wouldn’t feel right. Yet, when someone ignores ones needs and expects them to focus on their own needs, it is likely to be what feels right. And, what one could also find is that if they were to end up in a room full of people, they would most likely to be drawn to someone who will ignore their needs. What this will show is that they will have been drawn to someone who is an energetic match. A Closer Look What is clear is that one lacks boundaries, they don’t value themselves, and they don’t feel comfortable with their own needs. Deep down, they might not even realise that they are an individual, as opposed to an extension of others. Along with this, they could feel as though they are inherently worthless, believing that their needs are not important. Taking all this into account, one is then the perfect candidate for someone who is happy to use others. Back In Time What this is likely to show is that one didn’t receive the kind of care that they needing during their early years. This would have stopped them for being able to develop a strong sense of self. Perhaps they were brought up by a caregiver who saw them as an extension of themselves, which would have caused one to be more like a caregiver than a child who needed certain things to be able to grow and develop. As a result of being treated in this way, it would have stopped them from developing boundaries, disconnected them from their needs, and made them believe that their needs were something to be ashamed of. Awareness If one can relate to this, and they want to change their life, they may need to reach out for external support. This can take place with the assistance of a therapist or a healer.
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Oliver JR Cooper http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk
When someone is in a relationship, they may find that their behaviour doesn’t really change, and that this allows them to carry on as normal. Clearly, their life will be different as they will be with someone, but this won’t have caused them to become someone else.
Also, there are still going to be other areas of their life that will interest them. Said another way, their partner is not going to be seen as the centre of their world. A Number of Interests So, in addition to the time that they will spend with their partner, they will also spend time working on their career, with their friends, and taking part in different hobbies, for instance. One is then not going to be someone who puts all their eggs into one basket, so to speak. Now, this doesn’t mean that they won’t think about their partner when they are at work or at the gym, for instance, what it mean is that they will still be able to focus on what is at hand and to be able to function. Naturally, it is going to be normal for them to spend more time thinking about their pattern in the beginning of a relationship. Brand New This is then no different to how one is likely to spend a lot of time thinking about their car if it is brand new, and, of course, if it is a car that they are proud of. But as the days and weeks go by, they will gradually find that their attention is drawn towards other things. Having the ability to focus on what is taking place in each moment of their life and not spending too much time thinking about their partner, it is also likely to have a positive effect on their relationship. One is still going to behave in a way that is similar to how they behaved when they first got together. In Balance The others areas of one’s life are going to meet a number of their needs, stopping them from looking towards their partner to fulfil all of their needs. This is then going to stop them from being too needy and expecting too much. Ultimately, one is not going to see their partner as their mother/father, which will allow them to maintain their boundaries, thereby allowing them to realise that they are two separate people. There will be what this person can give them and what they can’t; just as there will be what they can give their partner and what they can’t. A Different Experience Although some people will be able to behave in this way when they are in a relationship, there are going to be others who end up losing all self-control when they end up with someone. As a result of this, their behaviour is likely to change and it will be a challenge for them to focus on other areas of their life. Having said that, to say that will be a challenge could be an understatement; it could be more or less impossible for them to focus on other areas of their life. It could then be as if one’s mind has been taken over by something. One Focus Therefore, regardless of what else is taking place in their life, they are going to spend most of their time thinking about their partner. It won’t matter if they have a career that is fulfilling or a number of hobbies that they enjoy. Through spending so much time thinking about their partner, they might not perform as well as usual at work. They might not be fully present when they are taking part in a hobby or are around friends, for instance, either. Trapped This could mean that they will be constantly sending messages to their partner, needing to know what they are doing and where they are. In the beginning, their partner may have appreciated being the centre of attention but, as time passed, ones behaviour is likely to be too much for them to handle. Their partner could end up feeling smothered and as though they are being suffocated by ones attention. The problem is that if ones partner was to end up pulling away, one could end up becoming even more obsessed – if that’s even possible. A Closer Look Their partner could wonder what has happened to them, and one could say their behaviour is just a sign of how much they love them. In reality, ones behaviour is likely to be more about control than love, and to be fear based. The reason why one’s mind is consumed by their partner is likely to be because of what is taking place at a deeper level. Underneath their minds obsessive thoughts, and their destructive behaviour, is likely to be a lot of pain/trauma. Emotional Wounds If they were to get out of their head and to connect with what is taking place in their body, they may find that they feel overwhelmed with pain. This could be a time when they will feel rejected, abandoned, powerless, hopeless and helpless. Being consumed with another person is then a way for them to keep this pain at bay, pain that is likely to be the result of what took place during their early years. It is then not that one necessarily loves their partner; it is that they are trying to avoid how they feel. Projection Another way of looking at this is to say that, unconsciously, one is projecting the mother/father they wanted onto their partner, with this allowing them to experience love, worth and a sense of belonging, amongst other things, by being with them. And, if they didn’t have this person in their life, it would cause them to get in touch with how they really felt when they were younger. Awareness Their early years may have been a time when they were abused and/or neglected. The years would have passed since that time in their life, but how they felt will have stayed trapped in their body. If one can relate to this, and they want to change their life, they may need to reach out for external support. The support of a therapist or a healer may be needed.
If you feel this has been of value, please leave a comment, like or get in touch. And feel free to share this article, as many others have.
Oliver JR Cooper http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk |
Oliver JR CooperAuthor of 26 books, Transformational Writer, Teacher & Consultant. Introductory Consultation
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Disclaimer
That which is contained within these articles is based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow, what I perceive as the truth will inevitably change and as a result of this - parts of these articles may not reflect my current outlook.
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